Friday, February 24, 2006


Today's Five O'Clock Rock


No other place like it. Now or ever.
"Native Stepson," Sonny Landreth
"Hot Tamale Baby," Buckwheat Zydeco
"Something's Wrong With This Picture," Galactic
# "Stretch Your Rubber Band," The Meters
# "Here Come the Girls," Ernie K-Doe
# "She's Taking My Part," Irma Thomas
# "Check Your Bucket," Eddie Bo
"I've Been So Lonely," Cookie & The Cupcakes
"Walking To New Orleans," Fats Domino
# "My Darlin' New Orleans," Lil’ Queenie & The Percolators
# "Who's Gonna Help Brother Get Further," Lee Dorsey
"On Your Way Down," Allen Toussaint
This Friday's iMix: Do You Know What It Means...?
(# = Even too rocked out for iTunes.)

Friday, February 17, 2006


Today's Five O'Clock Rock


I cannot tell a lie. This one was a rush job before the long weekend. But it's still cherry.
"Don't Lie to Me," Big Star
# "Love is Lies," the Buzzcocks
"I Can Tell (When You're Telling Me Lies)," John Wesley Harding
"Lyin' Eyes," the Eagles
"What a Fool Believes," the Doobie Brothers
"Lies," J.J. Cale
"Lie Like a Rug," Kix
"You Lie," the Muffs
"Was It a Lie?" Sleater-Kinney
"That's a Lie," Too Much Joy
"Liar," Rollins Band
# "To Tell the Truth" (Theme from the TV Game Show)
This Friday's iMix: I Can't Not Tell a Lie
(# = Even too rocked out for iTunes)

Friday, February 10, 2006


Today's Five O'Clock Rock


Here's how I roll.
"Seven Nation Army," The White Stripes
"Ten Year Plan," Therapy?
"Seven Day Weekend," New York Dolls
"Ten Lbs.," The Delta 72
"Seven Seas of Rhye," Queen
"Ten Percenter," Frank Black
"Seven Seas," Echo and The Bunnymen
"Ten to One," The Bats
"Seven," David Bowie
"Ten Men," Morcheeba
"Seven Long Years," The Guess Who
"Ten O'Clock," ? & The Mysterians
Then straight into the gutter.

This Friday's iMix: Seven-Ten Split

Friday, February 03, 2006


Today's Five O'Clock Rock


The big game calls for a D12-pack.
“High School,” MC5
“Down On The Street,” The Stooges
“Meet the Creeper,” Destroy All Monsters
“Mesmerizer,” The Come Ons
“Hey Sailor,” Detroit Cobras
“C'mon C'mon,” The Von Bondies
“Eat This City,” Thunderbirds Are Now!
“Dance Commander,” Electric Six
“Livin' for the City,” The Dirtbombs
“Hey Baby,” Ted Nugent
“Life In the D,” Brendan Benson
“I'm Bound to Pack it Up,” The White Stripes
This Friday's iMix: D-fense!

Friday, January 27, 2006


Today's Five O'Clock Rock
"Gimme My Mule," The Commodores
"Give Me Some Skin," James Brown
"Gimme What You Got," Keb' Mo'
"Give Me the Night," Randy Crawford
"Gimme Shelter," Merry Clayton #
"Give It to Me Baby," Rick James
"Gimme One of Those," The Brand New Heavies
"Give It to Me Two Times," Anders Osborne
"Give Me a Kiss," Van Morrison
"Give Me an Inch," Robert Palmer
"Give Me Strength," Eric Clapton
"Gimme a Pigfoot," LaVern Baker
"Gimme Some of That Yum Yum Yum," Johnnie Temple
This Friday's iMix: I've Got Needs
(# = Even too rocked out for iTunes)

Friday, January 20, 2006


Today's Five O'Clock Rock(s)
"Somebody Get Me a Doctor," Van Halen
"Calling Dr. Love," Kiss
"Bad Case of Loving You (Doctor, Doctor)", Robert Palmer
"Dr. Feelgood," Mötley Crüe
"The Doctor Is Calling," Megadeth
”I'm the Doctor," Motörhead
"Doctor Doctor," UFO
"Doctor, Doctor," The Who
"Dear Doctor," The Rolling Stones
"Doctor Wu," Steely Dan
"Doctor My Eyes," Jackson Browne
"Call the Doctor," J.J. Cale
This Friday's iMix: Five O'Clock Doc

And because it's been a long time, there was too much rock for just one twelve-pack:
"Bad Medicine," Bon Jovi
"Gimme Stitches," Foo Fighters
"Girl, You Have No Faith in Medicine," The White Stripes
"National Health," The Kinks
"Hospital Bed," Ben Kweller
"Tommy Gets His Tonsils Out," The Replacements
"Sick and Tired," Alex Chilton
"Night Nurse," Gregory Isaacs
"Medicine Show," Big Audio Dynamite
"Anna Stesia," Prince #
"Emergency," Kool & The Gang
"Mr. Ambulance Driver," The Flaming Lips
This Friday's other iMix: Five O'Clock Doc 2: The Quackening
(# = Even too rocked out for iTunes)

Friday, November 18, 2005


Today's Five O'Clock Rock

"Everybody, Everybody," Homestar Runner #
"Working for the Weekend," Loverboy
"Rainy Day Women #12 & 35," Bob Dylan #
"Hungry Heart," Bruce Springsteen
"Heartache Tonight," The Eagles #
"I've Got a Feeling," The Beatles #
"C'mon Everybody," Humble Pie
"Everybody Wants You," Billy Squier
"Everybody Wants Some!!" Van Halen
"Truth Hits Everybody," The Police
"Everybody Knows," Leonard Cohen
"Everyone's Gone to the Movies," Steely Dan
"Everybody Wants to Rule the World," Tears for Fears
"Everybody's My Friend," Kansas
"Everybody to the Limit," Homestar Runner #
This Friday's iMix: Everybody, Everybody
(# = Even too rocked out for iTunes)

Friday, November 11, 2005


Today's Five O'Clock Rock

"Quest for Fire," Iron Maiden
"Lost In America (Live Version)," Alice Cooper
"Some Kind of Wonderful," Grand Funk Railroad
"Colors," Ted Nugent & The Amboy Dukes
"Strange Brew," Cream
"Running On Empty," Jackson Browne
"Fame," David Bowie
"Tightrope," Stevie Ray Vaughan
"Firestarter," .38 Special
"Back to School," Ace Frehley
"No Way Out," Electric Light Orchestra
"All the Right Moves," David Hasselhoff
This Friday's iMix: Yellowed VHS Cases

Friday, November 04, 2005


Today's Five O'Clock Rock

"The Bug," Dire Straits
"The Full Bug," Van Halen
"Badass Bug," The Cramps
"Love Bug," Marcy Playground
"Love Bug (Album Version)," Tower of Power
"Ugh! It's a Bug," Jim Post
This Friday's iMix: Bug!

Friday, October 28, 2005


Today's Five O'Clock Rock

"Funeral March of a Marionette," Arthur Fiedler & Boston Pops
"The Bride of Frankenstein - Main Title," Franz Waxman
"These Are the Ghosts," A Band of Bees
"Frankenstein," Edgar Winter
"Spirits in the Material World," The Police
"Star Wars Theme / Cantina Band," Meco
"Voodoo Village," Tony Joe White
"Hungry Like the Wolf," Duran Duran
"Haunted When the Minutes Drag," Love and Rockets
"Monster Mash," Bobby "Boris" Pickett
"Spiders (Kidsmoke)," Wilco
"Nothing Scares Us," New Black
"Clap for the Wolfman," The Guess Who
"Manny's Bones," Los Lobos
"Lights Out," Little Walter
This Friday's iMix: Rocktober 31st

Friday, October 21, 2005


Today's Five O'Clock Rock

"Mr. Roboto," Styx
"Iron Man," Black Sabbath
"Almost Human," Kiss
"Rockit," Herbie Hancock
"Powered Wig Machine," Desert Sessions
"I Robot," The Juan MacLean
"The Young Machines," Her Space Holiday
"Star Wars Theme / Cantina Band," Meco
"Telstar," The Tornados
"Robot Parade," They Might Be Giants
This Friday's iMix: Stupid Robot

Thursday, July 28, 2005


Anytime Somebody Coins a New Word Beginning with "Bl"
To Cleverly Denote a Connection to "'Blogs," We Should ...

... have them "bleat" up.
... ignore any "blegging" for mercy.
... put out a contract on their "blife."
... stand over them as they "beed."
... stuff their corpse into a hollow "blog."

Today's FOCR: "Blah-Blah-Blah," Iggy Pop, Blah-Blah-Blah

Tuesday, June 14, 2005


Adventure Has a New _______


* Route to Work.
* Car. Well, "New Used."
* Apartment Much Closer to the El.
* Email Address, and Will Stop Checking This One Soon.
* Way of Organizing Its Bookmarks.
* Favorite Torani Flavor.
* Rule About Caffeine After Five.
* Xbox and Has Been Really Bad About Replying to Email. Sorry.
* Version of "Izzle"... "Ujo." Like, "It's the Shujo." Kind of Makes Everything Sound Bad Ass, You Know, Like Cujo. Shut Up.
* Boyfriend Who Treats It like a Princess and Will, in Time, Make Adventure Forget All About the Bastard-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Named.

Today's FOCR: "Born for Adventure," Styx, Equinox

Tuesday, April 05, 2005


Final Proof I'm Going to Hell


My giggling at this totenpope headline yesterday:
Mourning Pilgrims Pitch Tents in Rome Streets

I always knew I was going. I just figured it'd be over something other than a seventh-grade joke. A sweet, sweet seventh-grade joke.

Today's FOCR: "Pope Festival," Camper Van Beethoven, Camper Van Beethoven (bonus tracks)

Tuesday, February 08, 2005


Five O'Clock Jockamo

The best radio station, on the best day, in the best city in the world.

All you'd need to know today.

Today's FOCR: WWOZ-FM, New Orleans, La.

Thursday, January 27, 2005


Great Starkey's Malarkey, Batman!

[BBC News:]

Ringo Starr and Stan Lee are working on an animated TV show that will feature the former Beatle as an "evil-battling" superhero with "a great sense of rhythm."

Who gets by with a little help from his superfriends. Who gets high with a little help...

Whew. Had to get that one out of my head. Now, I'll go back to hearing the other thing I've heard in an endless mental loop all day long...

Today's FOCR: the Hamm's Beer jingle, written by the late Ernie Garven

Wednesday, January 26, 2005


The Snownership Society

Stifle this talk of "ownership" and "privatizing," and how the private sector does the job better than government. Allow me to share something the rest of the nation can learn from Chicago before throwing Social Security to the dogs.

Walk a few Chicago blocks in the days following a snowstorm. You'll notice a big difference between city and public property in the level of safe and easy travel.

Park sidewalks, city property and streets: shoveled and plowed. Always? Almost. Promptly? Usually. Done well? Surprisingly often.

Stores and private businesses: icy and poorly shoveled. Always? No. Often? Yes. Incompletely cleared? Oh, yes.

The reasons for this slippery schism, which came to me in hot mental vomit after I nearly threw my dick out on a patch of storefront ice, are simple and twofold.

One. The city budgets money for snow removal. Men and women who do snow removal are paid decently (too well, some might say) and it is their JOB. Likely to have protected jobs, they probably feel more secure in their jobs, knowing exactly the boundaries they'd have to cross in order to lose it. Their job, for which they are paid and have time to do, is removing snow.

Whereas, one would imagine, the UPS Store employee opening the store alone at 0800 probably has precious little time to also run outside and shove a pile of wet heart attack around, while the SUV throng stands around shrieking to see a manager if their Frontgate.com returns don't go out this hot fucking minute.

Two. There is a reason that cities budget money for snow removal. Political patronage jobs to throw around, you say. Absolutely. No argument there. But shut up anyway.

Snow clearing is not only necessary to a city's operation, but a city doesn't like to see old folks slip and kill themselves. It makes the city look bad. People would stop moving there. Then they wouldn't be buying things like ridiculous permits allowing you to park the car you own.

More than that, buried beneath all that, there's a vestigial reason that cities send out the shovels and plows. People of the burgh Expect and Demand it.

Businesses' primary motivation to shovel and plow (make products safe, emit less waste, not kill people) is to Keep From Getting Sued.

We used to live in an E&D society. Bit by bit, we're being trained to accept substitutes who give us only enough to KFGS.

Today's FOCR: "Gotta' Plow That Snow," James Coffey, Lots & Lots of Trucks

[No iTunes?]

Thursday, January 13, 2005


Ah, Memories

Via Ananova:

A Romanian couple who met on the internet named their new baby "Yahoo."

Whoa. Serious?

Thank you, thank you, I post once a week. Tip the blogstaff.

Today's FOCR: "Desperate but Not Serious," Adam Ant, Friend or Foe

[No iTunes?]

Thursday, January 06, 2005


Spooky

The Associated Press reports that primitive tribes of the Andaman and Nicobar Islands Indian archipelago may have had a "sixth sense" warning of the tsunami. Their ancient knowledge of the ocean and their Paleolithic lifestyle may have cued them to flee the shores, surviving the calamity.
"They can smell the wind. They can gauge the depth of the sea with the sound of their oars. They have a sixth sense which we don't possess," said Ashish Roy, a local environmentalist and lawyer who has called on the courts to protect the tribes by preventing their contact with the outside world.
This may no longer be an easy mission. Currently, Fox executives are approaching the island to find out exactly how the tribes just knew that a live-action Fat Albert movie would suck rocks.

Today's FOCR: "Voodoo Village," Tony Joe White, Tony Joe White

[No iTunes?]

Wednesday, November 17, 2004


O, U R N NYC EMT?

How does Diamond Dave actually get awesomer? Here's CBC to tell you:

David Lee Roth trains as paramedic.


Roth began his career in medicine several weeks ago, riding along with an ambulance crew in New York.
...
Roth has spent several nights a week responding to emergency calls in the Bronx, Brooklyn and Manhattan.
...
He even saved the life of a heart-attack victim by using a defibrillator.

Just for reference? Neither this guy nor this guy have much to say on this front, either.

Today's FOCR: "Somebody Get Me a Doctor," David Lee Roth & friends, David Lee Roth & Friends II

Big thanks to mon frère for the DLR alert.

[No iTunes?]