Today's Five O'Clock Rock (Episode 50)

THE Five O'Clock Rock?

Intro
Alex Chilton / The Replacements
Eddie Vedder / Local H
Tom Sawyer / Rush
Pablo Picasso / The Modern Lovers
Jesus Christ / Big Star
Johnny Appleseed / Joe Strummer & The Mescaleros
Sir Duke / Stevie Wonder
Bo Diddley / The Meters
Shadrach / The Beastie Boys
Dennehy / Serengeti
Bruce Lee / Underworld
James Brown / Big Audio Dynamite
Johnny Mathis' Feet / American Music Club
Ingrid Bergman / Billy Bragg & Wilco
Hong Kong Phooey / Sublime

This Friday's Mix: Name Checking

...But I Heard the Hook Was on His Foot

One more strike against everything I learned on the playground.

I always thought that Van Halen was famous for requiring their backstage bowls of M&Ms be filled only with green ones, due to their purported aphrodisiac qualities. 

Turns out, idiot, the backstage rider wasn't "all green ones," but rather "no brown ones." And the reason, at least according to Diamond Dave, was a totally practical one having nothing to do with making Teacher hot(ter).

Perhaps it's time to revisit my phobia of eating KFC at the drive-in.

Nope. Still too scary. (SHUDDER) KFC.

Today's blow to childhood conventional wisdom delivered by allmusic.com.

The 7 Habits and/or Toiletries* of Highly Effective People



* As evidenced by the briefcase left on our garbage cans.

7. Being Proactive
6. Old Spice Red Zone Body Wash
5. Dollar-store Febreze knock-off
4. Putting First Things First
3. Literature of Bill W. & Top rolling papers (tie)
1. Begin with the End in Mind...But if You're Caught Mid-Alley-Defecation, Forget the Briefcase and Run

Today's Five O'Clock Rock (Episode 49)

Oooh, you dirty year.

Intro
Rats In The Cellar / Aerosmith
Ratcity In Blue / Good Rats
Lay It Down / Ratt
Like A Goddam Rat / Early Man
Reveal the Rats / Fatal Flying Guillotines
Rat Patrol / Naked Raygun
Rats / Pearl Jam
I Came As A Rat / Modest Mouse
I Think I Smell A Rat / The White Stripes
Bold Rat / The Coctails
I Smell A Rat / Clarence Carter
Rats In My Kitchen / Sleepy John Estes
Rat In My Kitchen / UB40
Rat Race / Bob Marley
Year Of The Rat / Badly Drawn Boy

This Friday's Mix: Year of the Rat

Today's Five O'Clock Rock (Episode 48)

A little something for your yearhole.

Intro
Heretics / Andrew Bird
Here Comes the Rain / The Ladybug Transistor
Mistaken For Strangers / The National
Mutiny, I Promise You / The New Pornographers
A Hand to Take Hold of the Scene / Okkervil River
Up On Crutches / The Sea And Cake
Party / El Perro Del Mar
How Dark Is Your Dark Side / His Name Is Alive
Lord, Let Us Shine / The Pink Mountaintops
Eyes On The Prize / Mavis Staples
How Long Do I Have To Wait For You? / Sharon Jones and the Dap-Kings
Deep In The Sand / The Budos Band
Way Back When / Buck 65
Oh Katrina / Anders Osborne
Shake It Off / Wilco

This Friday's Mix: Ear in Review
(Yes, some are older than 2007. Never was accused of being overly up-to-the-minute.)

Today's Five O'Clock Rock (Episode 47)

It was a day and/or night like no other. One I will remember 'til the day and/or night I die.

Intro
The Day I Tried to Live / Soundgarden
Today / Smashing Pumpkins
The Day that Curly Billy Shot Down Crazy Sam McGee / The Hollies
The Night Chicago Died / Paper Lace
Turn-Down Day / The Cyrkle
Tuesday, Oct. 24th / Clem Snide
A Big Day In The North / Black Grape
Papa Was a Rolling Stone / The Pioneers
The Night The Lights Went Out In Georgia / Vicki Lawrence
December 1963 (Oh, What A Night) / Frankie Valli And The Four Seasons
Saturday In the Park / Chicago
Such A Night / Clyde McPhatter & The Drifters
The Night They Drove Old Dixie Down / Joan Baez
The Day They Sold Beer In Church / Norman Greenbaum
Nobody Told Me / John Lennon
Eve Of Destruction / Barry McGuire

This Friday's Mix: Days of Infamy

Today's Five O'Clock Rock (Episode 46)

Okay, this takes some background.

Way back, there was this scene that my friend Kit and I always talked about putting into a screenplay. It was basically a real conversation of ours. The scene would have gone something like this:

INT. CAR
J is driving. KIT is shotgun. On the radio, Sam Cooke's "What a Wonderful World" is in its final chorus.
KIT: What a perfect song. Just perfect. Sam Cooke, right?
J: Yep.
KIT: Man, whatever happened to him?
J: He was shot outside a motel office, wearing nothing but a trenchcoat.
KIT: JESUS. Really?
J: Mmm-hmm.
On the radio, Marvin Gaye's "What's Going On" begins to play.
KIT: Nothing bad happened to Marvin Gaye, did it?
J: Shot.
KIT: Damn.
J: By his own father.
KIT: Fuck!
KIT reaches over and turns the radio dial.
KIT: Them?
J: Singer, car crash.
KIT changes the dial again.
J: Car.
Again.
J: Car.
Again.
J: Plane.
Again.
J: Drowned.
Again.
J: Can't remember. Something with vomit.
Again.
J: Drowned in vomit.
KIT turns off the radio.
KIT: Okay. The one song that will cheer me up, no matter what's wrong. (INHALES) Please, please tell me that, somewhere, the theme-from-"Maude" guy is a fat happy grandpa.
J: Fell out a window.
There is silence.
KIT: (POINTS) That bar up there.
J: Sounds good.
EXT. CAR
The car exits the freeway.
KIT: But then we're sleeping it off in the car.

Sorry. It's just been that sort of week. Not to mention how I felt myself age by writing that I have used a car radio with dials.

Intro
Big Houses / House Of Freaks
I'm Free Now / Morphine
#1 Hit Song / Minutemen
Ticket Tulane / Silkworm
Trouble / Little Feat
Ballad Of Big Nothing / Elliott Smith
Things Behind The Sun / Nick Drake
New Year's Prayer / Jeff Buckley
You And Your Sister / Chris Bell
That's Where It's At / Sam Cooke
When Did You Stop Loving Me, When Did I Stop Loving You / Marvin Gaye
You've Got A Friend / Donny Hathaway
I'll Have To Say I Love You In A Song / Jim Croce
Let's Get Lost / Chet Baker
Loving You / Minnie Riperton
Don't Cry / J Dilla

This Friday's Mix: Whatever Happened To?

Do This, Don't Do That/Can't Yuu Read the Sign?



This picture, it's hilareus.

Word of the Week

Se•cret Han•ta

(n.) The process of swapping viruses at holiday gatherings, usually done anonymously.

I think Cousin Earl must have had me for Secret Hanta. I remember seeing him sneeze into the cider.

Today's Five O'Clock Rock (Episode 45)

All the better to rock you.

Intro
What Would Wolves Do? / Les Savy Fav
The Wolf Put His Mouth On Me / His Name Is Alive
The Grandmother Wolf / Pretty Girls Make Graves
Teenage Werewolf / The Barbarellas
Hungry Like the Wolf / Duran Duran
Wild Flower / The Cult
Run With The Wolf / Rainbow
Werewolves of London / Magnolia Electric Co
Little Red Riding Hood / Sea Monster
Clap for the Wolfman / The Guess Who
Hillbilly Wolf / Link Wray
The Howling Wolf / Lightnin' Hopkins
Let The Wolves Howl At The Moon / Super Furry Animals
Full Moon / The Kinks
Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf? (Part 2) / Jimmy Smith
Prenez garde au grand méchant loup / Django Reinhardt

This Friday's Mix: What Big Teeth

Today's Five O'Clock Rock (Episode 16)

This is something of a repeat, but it's new to the podcast. So don't drive yourself crazy asking which came first.

Intro
Chicken Payback / A Band Of Bees
Mansize Rooster / Supergrass
Chicken Little Was Right / The Turtles
Chicken Pox / Booker T. & The M.G.'s
Memphis Women and Chicken / Dan Penn
Chicken Shack / Charlie Musselwhite
Chicken Shake / Stereo MC's
Chicken / Devendra Banhart
Chicken Grease / D'Angelo
Do the Funky Chicken / Rufus Thomas
How Funky Is Your Chicken / Jackson 5
Sweet Rhode Island Red / Ike & Tina Turner
Egg Man / The Beastie Boys
A Chicken with Its Head Cut Off / The Magnetic Fields
Want Me Cock / Owen & Leon Silveras
Chicken Talk / Yma Sumac

This Friday's Mix: Chicken!

When Character Limits Go Really, Really Wrong

Today's Five O'Clock Rock (Episode 44)

What do toddlers and job seekers have in common?

Intro
(I Don't Want to Go To) Chelsea / Elvis Costello
I Don't Want to Lose You / The Smithereens
I Don't Wanna Face It / John Lennon
I Don't Know What I Want / The Raspberries
I Don't Ever Want to Come Down / The 13th Floor Elevators
Don't Want To Know If You Are Lonely / Hüsker Dü
I Don't Want To Lose You Yet / Eddie Spaghetti
I Don't Want To Get Over You / Mary Lou Lord
I Don't Want to Know / Nils Lofgren
I Don't Want Love / Dan Hicks And The Hot Licks
(I Don't Want To) Hang Up My Rock And Roll Shoes / The Band
I Don't Want to Know / Fleetwood Mac
I Don't Want To Spoil The Party / The Blazers
I Don't Want to Kill Anymore / Chan Poling
I Don't Want You On My Mind / Bill Withers
I Don't Want To Set The World On Fire / Ink Spots

This Friday's Mix: No, Thanks!

Today's Five O'Clock Rock

Making like a tree and getting out of here.

Intro
Modeling Sucks / Handsome Boy Modeling School
I'm Settin Away / Fu Manchu
Gonna Leave You / Queens Of The Stone Age
Color Me Gone / Girl Trouble
Goodbye To You / Scandal
Auf Wiedersehen / Cheap Trick
Goodbye Again / The Iguanas
Call It a Day / The Raconteurs
Never Can Say Goodbye / Isaac Hayes
…And I'm Out / Galactic w/ Mr. Lif
Moving / Supergrass
Gone For Good / The Shins
I'm Bound to Pack it Up / The White Stripes
Kyle Quit The Band / Tenacious D
Over The Hills And Far Away / Led Zeppelin
Drift Away / Dobie Gray

This Friday's Mix: Bye Now

Today's Five O'Clock Rock

The definitive infinitive.

Intro
Cruel To Be Kind / Spacehog
Made To Be Broken / Soul Asylum
Right To Be Wrong / Delbert McClinton
Got To Be Someone / The Waco Brothers
Ways To Be Wicked / Lone Justice
Nothing To Be Done / The Pastels
Never To Be Repeated / The Long Blondes
Fun To Be Happy / Love Tractor
Got To Be Free / The Rulers
Soon To Be Large / Charizma & Peanut Butter Wolf
Free To Be Freaks / The Freak Accident
Born To Be Hit / The New Duncan Imperials
Born To Be Bad / Carl Mann
Happy To Be Here / Todd Snider
Hard To Be You / The 88
Touched To Be Sure / Robert Pollard

This Friday's Mix: That Is the Question

Today's Five O'Clock Rock

Okay, so, I got an iPhone. I began the day of the price cuts swearing I'd never do it, but after five minutes of trying one out, I had to do it. It's the mapping. Maps and directions on demand are crucial for someone with a notoriously bad sense of direction like mine. I get lost constantly, but I can totally grasp where I should be if I can just see it. Now I'm totally set.

Unless I lose the iPhone.

Intro
I Got Kinda Lost / Chris Bell
Lost In the Supermarket / The Clash
Finding My Way / Rush
Can't Find My Way Home / Styx
There's No Way Out Of Here / David Gilmour
Is This Where? / Mission of Burma
Lost Highway / Hank Williams
Turn Around / Carl Perkins
Side O' The Road / Creedence Clearwater Revival
Too Late to Turn Back Now / Cornelius Brothers & Sister Rose
Will it Go 'Round In Circles / Billy Preston
A Place Nobody Can Find / Sam & Dave
There's A Break In The Road / Betty Harris
Love Map / Lyndon
Farther On Down The Road (You Will Accompany Me) / Taj Mahal
Where Could I Go But To The Lord / Jesse Fuller

This Friday's Mix: A Bit Lost

Today's Five O'Clock Rock

Seventeen years ago tomorrow, I was at Stevie Ray Vaughan's second-to-last show.

The van ride up to Alpine Valley was cramped. We sat way back on the lawn, relying on the video monitor to see anything at all. Wedged between Robert Cray, Jeff Healey and Eric Clapton, the Stevie Ray set wasn't nearly long enough. The drive back that same night was a long one. I think I wound up sleeping away most of Stevie Ray's last day on earth, just to recover from the trip.

But I would pay twenty times what I paid for that show to see it again. At these rates, you understand, all I ask for is a slightly more comfortable ride. Seventeen extra years aren't kind to the knees or ass.

Intro
Scuttle Buttin' / Stevie Ray Vaughan & Double Trouble
Couldn't Stand The Weather / SRV & DT
Change It / SRV & DT
Mary Had a Little Lamb / SRV & DT
These Blues Is Killing Me / A.C. Reed
Soulful Dress / Marcia Ball
Cold Shot / SRV & DT
Look At Little Sister / SRV & DT
Double Whammy / Lonnie Mack
C.O.D. / Angela Strehli & Stevie Ray Vaughn
Long Way From Home / The Vaughan Brothers
Pipeline / Stevie Ray Vaughan and Dick Dale
God Knows / Bob Dylan
Life By The Drop / Stevie Ray Vaughan
Lenny / SRV & DT
Life Without You / SRV & DT

This Friday's Mix: Couldn't Stand the Weather

Today's Five O'Clock Rock

Because what's driving in the summertime without hot vinyl?

Intro
Summer's Cauldron / XTC
Grass / XTC
Every Kinda People / Robert Palmer
Harlem / Bill Withers
Take Me Girl (I'm Ready) / Jr. Walker and the Allstars
Hot Fun in the Summertime / Sly and the Family Stone
Please Don't Make Me Cry / UB40
Summer of Our Love / Bar-Kays
Summertime / Big Brother & the Holding Company
Thank You / Led Zeppelin
Deep Blue Sea / John Mayall
Under the Boardwalk / Sam & Dave
Cherry Pink and Apple Blossom White / Roy Clark
The Look of Love / Julius Wechter and the Baja Marimba Band
Tomorrow / Joe Walsh
Be Here Now / George Harrison

This Friday's Mix: Summerly Too

Today's Five O'Clock Rock

Can’t think of joke no brain work mmmm summer.

Intro
Ponta De Lança Africano (Umbabaraúma) / Jorge Ben
Spark Plug / Stereolab
Chinese Checkers / Booker T. & The MG's
Un Homme Et Une Femme / Francis Lai
Scenic World / Beirut
Too Strong / The Sea And Cake
La Iguana / Los Lobos
Canterurias / Cecilia Barraza
Midnight at the Oasis / Maria Muldaur
Day Dreamin' / Aretha Franklin
Castles Made Of Sand / Jimi Hendrix Experience
At The River / Groove Armada
Simple X / Andrew Bird
Southern Nights / Allen Toussaint
Ené alantchi alnorem (I Can't Live Without You) / Mulatu Astatke
If We Never Meet Again This Side of Heaven / Leon Redbone

This Friday's Mix: Summerly

Worst-written Headline of the Day

"Bjorn Borg bitten during dogfight, withdraws from exhibition"

Disappointingly, one reads on to find out that the Wimbledon champ was (a) not in a dogfight, and therefore (b) was not taking part in a dogfighting exhibition.